One of the stranger aspects of life during lockdown is how legitimately difficult it is to remember what day it happens to be. (Is it Tuesday? Friday? Neither?) As the days roll unchangingly into each other, it’s hard to plan for—or even recognize—the weekend.
That’s a mistake, says Lori Gottleib, psychotherapist and author of Maybe You Should Talk To Someone. She cautions that in order to property recharge during these challenging times, it’s crucial to delineate your weekend. “I tell people, ‘try to make your weekdays look as much like weekdays as possible, and that includes looking forward to the weekend,’” she says. “You really want a little frustration of ‘Oh, I want to do that, but it’s not the weekend yet.’”
Wherever you can, she says, try and build in a little anticipation for the end of the week. “And it doesn’t need to be a big thing, it can be small things.” Gottlieb, a Los Angeles resident, has been hopping into her car every weekend for an exploratory drive with her fourteen-year-old son. “I have to drive my car once a week so my battery doesn’t die, so we’ve been going to all kinds of places that we would never go, which has been really fun.”
Save (and Savor) Everyday Experiences
I reserve movies I’m eager to see for the weekend, for no other reason than to have something to look forward to. (Reelgood’s free site features the latest releases from over fifty streaming services.) I’ll be devoting next weekend to the highly anticipated Love Fraud, the docu-series directed by Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady. It follows Richard Scott Smith, who for two decades has preyed on vulnerable women for money, and remains at large. When his victims feel the law has failed them, they turn to a bounty hunter named Carla to track him down.
I also save takeout for the weekends, and order from (an open) restaurant I’ve wanted to try. Next up is Oaxacan mole rojo from Brooklyn’s Claro. They’ve begun offering organic stoneground masa flour on their menu so you can make your own tortillas at home. (Perhaps they’re the new sourdough starter?) I buy flowers, on weekends only, from my farmer’s market—blessedly still open on Sundays.
Try Something New
Gottlieb recommends creatively challenging yourself to come up with new weekend activities. Online offerings abound. Do a virtual museum visit, such as the stellar tour of Egyptian antiquities from the Louvre. Take comfort in the collective experience: online visitors have jumped tenfold in the past weeks.
Get Physical
Get moving with Lady Gaga’s former backup dancer Mark Kanemura, who hosts dance parties on Instagram every day at 5 p.m. EST. (At that time on weekdays, I’m inevitably caught up in a work project, so I slot it in on the weekend.) Kanemura says he plans on keeping the gatherings going as long as stay-home orders continue. “We've built this beautiful community that often reminds me that we are all in this together despite how alone we may feel during this time,” he says.
Alvin Ailey Extension does free live-streamed classes on weekends—and Sunday’s Beginner Horton class, taught by Terri Wright and featuring live drum accompaniment, is a generous hour and a half. Horton, a modern technique based on Native American dances, uses a whole-body approach including lateral stretches and deep lunges. (Simply sign up at least 30 minutes in advance through Mindbody, or on their app.)
Take Your Time
Seek out more time-intensive projects that you aren’t able to do during the week, from multi-phased beauty treatments such as Dr. Barbara Strum’s new seven-step The Glow Kit to cooking. I’ve been happily working my way through Yotam Ottolenghi’s more involved recipes on Saturdays.
The chef himself does the same. “Like many parents during the lockdown, I've become a tutor to my two sons,” says Ottolenghi. “As we're trying to keep some routine —some days more successful than others—I keep weekday cooking a little simpler; eggs and soldiers for breakfast or a quick lemon drizzle cake for an afternoon snack. The weekend is reserved for more ambitious efforts, like a roasted lamb shoulder, a gratin or a child-friendly trifle.”
Balance the Calendar
But even low-key pursuits should be actively planned, says time management expert and Oprah Winfrey favorite Julie Morgenstern. She says to envision the weekend as seven distinct units of time—Friday night, Saturday morning, afternoon, and evening, and Sunday morning, afternoon, and evening. Devote one or two distinct units to errands and chores, and don’t allow them bleed into the others, which should be reserved for more restorative activities like exercise, interests, or Zooming with friends and family.
It may seem counterintuitive to structure your weekends, says Morgenstern, “but without it, you waste a lot of time trying to decide what to do. Or you keep it too loose, and your weekend slips through your fingers.” This is an endurance game, she says, “and we need to be structured to refuel before we run out of gasoline—not do self-care when we have conked out and can go no further.”
And it’s okay, during these incredibly challenging times, to take refuge in pleasure, adds Gottlieb. “People are so afraid of experiencing joy in the midst of pain, or feeling guilty that they’re having fun,” she says. “Well, both things can coexist. Weekends have always been a time of anticipatory joy, and still should be. Just because we’re in a global pandemic doesn’t mean that weekends are cancelled.”
